Getting pregnant with Maggie and having her was a dream come true! I couldn’t fathom having a child of my own. We didn’t have much but we just couldn’t tell her no! She was spoiled too much and by too many people but on the flip side no one even imagined that I would ever get pregnant and have a child of my own so of course she was loved and spoiled unspeakably!!! The girls loved her so much and were just as much a part of her life as they were of ours. Victoria, who lived with the 3 of us for one year before she went to Natchitoches for College. S he has graduated now with a teaching degree and she is teaching kindergarten there. Stephanie used to take Maggie home with her for sleepovers since she was two and now that she has two kids she is so busy that we sadly 😞 rarely see her.
When Maggie turned three Mark’s mother and stepfather moved their business back to Texas, Mark was working for them in Hammond at home. So we decided then to put Maggie in day care and Mark went to nursing school in Covington. I would go to PJ’s down the road from the school and I would sit there from 8 o’clock in the morning till noon and then he would come by for lunch and help me to the bathroom then he would go back to school until 3:30 and then he would come pick me up. We did that for about five months. Then on one fateful day in February Mark had come to PJ’s for lunch and took me to the bathroom then I decided to just wait in the van at the school and do my writing (I was writing a book about my life) while I was waiting on him to finish. Mark left when he was almost done because I had to go so bad that I ended up peeing on myself (one of those fun facts of having a baby) and now of course, Mark left in the middle of class to bring me home. Because he left to take take care of me that resulted in him getting a zero on a quiz which he then wound up missing that passing grade by 0.2 of a point! This was it, no second chances. I felt horrible! He got dropped out of the program because of me. No ifs ands or buts, it was my fault!
Well there was nothing else to do, so we did what every other red blooded American would do and we joined a network marketing company! 😂 Just kidding! It was a great company with amazing products that were Nrf2 activated products, and I actually did pretty well on these products. Shortly after this I got pregnant again! What the heck??? I honestly wondered if this would ever happen again. When I had Maggie, I kept thinking in the back of my mind that it WAS possible for me to have another baby, I secretly gave myself a timeline of having another baby by 35. Well guess what, I was 36 and about to turn 37. What the heck?? I’m a little old to be having another baby, don’t you think? I was major freaked and excited but I knew that my parents didn’t want me to tempt fate, as they say. My mom had told me well before this happened that she thought it would be very risky for me to get pregnant again because she said that it was a miracle that I had Maggie and she didn’t want anything bad to happen. My dad’s reaction was surprisingly worse. There was no happiness or excitedness like before. I remember and I will never forget what he said, he looked at me and yelled, “ARE YOU STUPID?” My response was no I am not, do you honestly think that it was my plan to get pregnant at almost 37 years old but it happened and I would not change anything. So of course I left there feeling like crap. I was being judged by none other thanThe people that wereSupposed to love me unconditionally, my family, when all I really needed and wanted was support. I knew my parents were just concerned for me but it still hurt. God doesn’t make mistakes! Remember what I said Que Sera Sera, whatever will be will be! The future’s not ours to see! Anyway this pregnancy started starting very different with some of the typical symptoms. But a few weeks after I found out, something felt off. I went to the bathroom and when I wiped I noticed a trace of blood. So I called Mark in there and he called the doctor to see what to do. They said it was normal and not uncommon and for me not to worry. Yeah right! Later that evening I started cramping really bad so we loaded up with Maggie and went to the ER. My parents met us there and took Maggie home with them. When I got to the back room and changed into a gown I started bleeding heavier. I looked at the big spot of bright red blood and started bawling. Mark was holding me while I kept repeating over and over, I’m losing him! How can this be happening? I had just started to accept the fact that I was pregnant and getting excited about giving Maggie a sibling! (On a side note, Maggie swore up and down that the baby was a boy and in my heart I believed it was a boy so I named him Matthew Joseph) So after a couple of weeks of tests and untrasounds and blood work, it was determined I did in fact miscarry. That was a very hard time for me and it just so happened to be right before Easter. I was so angry and questioning God, like why did I have to go through this?! Before the final answer came I made a plea to God, that if it was his will for me to have the baby then to let everything be all right, and if it was not his will and something was wrong with the baby then please take him. So my prayers were answered, not really the way I wanted and even though I was sad, I was somewhat at peace. It was hard for a while but I got through it eventually and I didn’t lose sight of my heavenly father’s will.
In February 2016 Mark and I were at a convention in Nashville, and I kept having to go to the bathroom and every time I went I kept checking for my monthly cycle. It never came and I was like, “No, this can’t be!” I was in a state of denial so I didn’t even bother to get a test until we got home. We got home on a Sunday and I waited until the following day to take a test. So we were a little surprised after a few minutes a plus sign was very clear. I was not that surprised but I was extremely concerned. I mean I was 39 years old at the time. I have total faith that God knows what he is doing but in saying that, I just didn’t know how to deal with friends and especially family after last time. I was probably only four or five weeks at the time and I vowed not to tell family or friends (at least not most of them) until I was in the second trimester. It was so hard not to get excited or tell anyone, but I guess that’s just the price I was going to have to pay.
I remembered most of the routine from when I was pregnant with Maggie but a lot had changed. This time when I would have to go see the perinatologist, the doctor came to my Gynecology Clinic and I didn’t have to do very much testing this time. When I went to the doctor to confirm the pregnancy, they asked the typical questions. But when they came to the question, how many children do you have? My answer was easy. Only one child. Then they asked the question that would bring the past back into the open. How many pregnancies have you had? My answer was not so easy. I have had three pregnancies. There it was one of my biggest heartaches.
I waited until I had an ultrasound at 10 weeks before I told anyone. I told my parents over the phone because I was afraid of what their reaction would be. They actually took it rather well, they said well, we’ll take it one day at a time. I think they may have felt bad after my miscarriage and obviously being so scared to say anything. I thought things were going to be the same way they were when I was pregnant with Maggie, that was very much not the case. Most of my friends had two or three kids already and I was just starting on number two. I started to get my feelings hurt because no one was around as much as before, but now I see that everyone was just wrapped up and it wasn’t that no one wanted anything to do with me. It was just hard for me to accept reality. My brother had two kids also and of course my parents were with them way more so they weren’t around as much neither.
This was at 15 weeks and four days and now they didn’t have to do an ultrasound at 20 weeks to find out the gender. They only had to do a blood test and that also tested for Down syndrome and some other things. So when I went for my monthly ultrasound the nurse asked me if I wanted to know what the gender was. Now Maggie was intent on the fact that it was a girl, she said God said it was girl. So we told the nurse asked, we said, yes we wanted to know. She then asked me what I wanted. I told her a girl, because we had all girls and didn’t know how to deal with a boy. She then told me that I was getting what I wanted and that it was indeed a girl. So we left the doctor, and went to the store to buy a baby girl outfit. So when we went to pick up Maggie from school, she got in the car and said, so what is it? So we showed her the outfit and she said, matter-of-factly, I knew it! She said I asked Jesus for a sister. 💩 took the surprise out of my surprise!!
I had sat down with Maggie that night to go through baby names. I had chosen like 15 different names and out of all those names she picked Sofia, and for the middle name she also picked Celeste. So my due date was October 24th and then Sofia Celeste would be joining our family. I chose the spelling s o f i a because I didn’t want it to be common. But everyone still spells it with a p h!😂
This pregnancy was so very different from the first one. The main thing was that this time I was so much older and my body ached more and I was always tired. The Perianatologist told me something that I never thought I would have to worry about and that was that I could pass my disease on to both of my girls. When I was a little girl and I was going through all that testing, My family was also going through genetic testing. Because it was so rare that two sisters would have the same malfunctioned gene which resulted in Friedreich’s Ataxia. I somewhat remember them telling us that my brother was a carrier of the gene and if his partner also carries the gene that his kids could either have the disease or be carriers. My sister and I have the disease so we weren’t carriers. In this case I thought well I guess I can’t pass on the disease but the perinatologist told us that one, both, or neither could have the disease or be carriers. Though it was a very small percentage. What the heck? Why hadn’t anyone told me this 7 years ago? No I wouldn’t have done anything to abort my pregnancy but I probably would have tried a little harder to prevent the second and third.
Mark and I had a huge decision to make. The doctor told us that we could have Mark tested to see if he carried the gene and if he did there was a 30 percent chance that one or both or neither of my girls would have the disease or be a carrier of the gene. The test was a very expensive test, which wasn’t really a major deterrent. We talked and prayed and in the end decided not to have him tested. We’re leaving it in God’s hands because he can get us through anything!
This is me at 29 weeks! And this is Sofia at 31 weeks and 4 days!
I was getting so uncomfortable and at 35 weeks and 4 days my doctor told me that everything was looking good and if I went into labor now, they would not stop labor. So of course I prayed like I’ve never prayed to go into labor on my own. I was so extremely uncomfortable and the only relief I would get was to lay down and nap. It seemed like the last few weeks of pregnancy that I was always in the bed. I was doing weekly appointments now and I was 37 weeks and three days and the OB that I was seeing that day was Dr. Elizabeth Shuman and she had checked me and said that I was three centimeters dialated. I told her that she was the one that made the decision to induce when I delivered Maggie, I was induced at exactly 37 weeks and four days. Which I would be tomorrow, and she said well I have an opening tomorrow morning. I can induce and deliver tomorrow, if you would like. October 11, 2016 would be the day that Sofia would come into our lives and make us a family of four, and this also happened to be my dad’s birthday. So I got in there and I got all hooked up and it was probably close to nine when they started the Pitocin. It was different this time and I told the nurse that I would not be taking any pain medication because I wanted to be awake and aware of everything. And when my baby was born I wanted to enjoy the moment without being so tired that I couldn’t keep my eyes opened, which is what happened with Maggie. The induction medicine kicked in rather fast and it was probably around 11 when the contractions were getting stronger. And probably around noon I felt the urge to push, so the nurse checked me and I was already at 10 centimeters dilated I had started the induction after several patients so Dr Shuman thought that I would be delivering after everyone else. Obviously they could not assume anything with me! LOL!
So she got all gowned up and covered and I started to push with all my might! It all seemed like a blur. You know when they say push like you’re having a bowel movement, well it’s real!😂 After lots of pushing, her stubborn shoulder finally came through and she shot out and luckily Mark caught her! They laid her on my chest and I was so relieved and in love! At exactly 1:04 p.m. Sofia Celeste graced us with her precense and was a whopping 6 pounds & 6 ounces and 18 inches long!
@
So very tiny and absolutely beautiful! It was just so unreal looking at her and thinking, we made her and I carried her for nine months and pushed her out. I did what everyone thought I could not do and in a lot less time than everyone thought. Don’t underestimate me! 😂 BUT as soon as she was out, I said I AM SO VERY DONE!!! 😂
It boggles my mind when I hear of mothers aborting their baby or purposefully harming their baby or even killing them. I just don’t understand how a mother can carry a baby inside them and then do all that, it’s just an awful and unforgivable thing!!
So that afternoon, some friends of ours, where Maggie was staying, brought her to the Hospital to meet her little sister. The instantaneous love that Maggie showed her sister was so very beautiful!💕 The best gift that I could have ever given my child was a sister! Someone who would forever be with and there for her when it doesn’t seem like anyone else is there.
When we got home, things were so very different. We stopped being on time for stuff when we had just Maggie, now it was like ten times worse!😂 Things were definitely hard to say the least but I wouldn’t change it for the world! I breastfed Sofia for 13 months and then I cut her off. It was hard but not as painful as it was with Maggie. And probably for a good eight months, Sofia was very much a mama’s girl and of course I could not be anymore happier. Then she turned into a daddy’s girl and a Paw-Paw’s girl! What the heck??? After all that hard work and I get eight months! Really? Actually it’s probably because I don’t walk and Mark has to put her to bed and get her up and down for naps so of course for now she runs to Daddy for everything. On the flip side Maggie and I are starting to get closer? But they are like daylight and dark. Maggie is very hot natured like her daddy and Sofia is very cold natured like her mama. Maggie wants to be in the cool house reading and Sofia will run around and play outside all day long. Maggie always wants her hair down with nothing in it and Sofia always has it up and wants a bow. Maggie’s teeth came in late and Sofia’s came in super early! Sofia worships Maggie even though Maggie loves to get on her nerves. Sofia has a dark brown dime size birthmark on her back and her second and third toes are connected on both feet but that doesn’t slow her down and she can still wear flip flops which she loves! Those things make her special and unique and she is a wonderful addition to our family. She is almost three and things have been a roller coaster but there is never a dull moment in the Cheramie house!!!
