For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord , “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
Jeremiah 29:11
I was born into a very deout Catholic upbringing. My family on my mom’s and my dad’s side were both Catholic. However I was always feeling like I needed more. And I’d go quite often to church with my best friend who went to a Baptist Church in Tickfaw. I was yearning for something but I didn’t know what. I went to a play with my best friend when I was a freshman in college. It was called Heaven’s Gates and Hell’s Flames, while watching that play I realized that I didn’t have a relationship with Jesus. I didn’t even know to have a0 relationship with Jesus.
I didn’t drive and I was at the mercy of going where who I was with went. That usually was my family and some friends and by the time I started college my mom and dad didn’t go that much anymore. But when I was younger we would go to church with my mother every Sunday and then go to my grandmother’s in Ponchatoula for lunch. I loved that time and would relish that time with family. My sister and me and my brother would go on Wednesdays to religion class AKA CCD and then when I was in 11th grade, I was confirmed.
I remember always questioning the teachers in religion class “who created God?”. I just couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that the answer was always God just is and was before everything. That always boggled my mind. When I got to college I got to explore different denominations. It wasn’t even about my belief. It was more the fact that the Catholic church was so repetitive and there really wasn’t much beyond Sunday church. It kind of felt robotic.
My draw was mainly to the Baptist church because of the interaction and feeling loved and accepted. I didn’t know anything about salvation or Jesus Christ dying for us. When you are raised one way and your parents have been raised that way and their parents have been raised that way, it’s hard to go against that. But I was pretty much on my own in College, so I made the decision where to go and what to believe. I was an adult and I was in charge of my own destiny! I started going with my other best friend to her church which was the worldwide Church of God, and I kind of liked it mainly because of the socialization. But I loved the fact that when I went to the Baptist Church with other friends, it just spoke to me more. I kept wanting to go back, it was like I had a never ending thirst that I couldn’t quench. It was a pain in the butt having to rely on others to go places. (It wasn’t because of my disease that I didn’t drive. It was because I saw my mother get in a car accident. It shook me up so bad that I was afraid to get behind a wheel.)
Before I got married, I started to go to a Baptist Church with my friend Jaime and her boyfriend Davin, it was called Woodland Park Baptist Church. We had started going to a Bible study class that met at night and it was called College and Careers and was taught by Andy Stafford, who we had all three gone to school with. I really liked that class and it really got me to thinking about life in general. When Mark and I met we continued to go to the church where I was attending. The first couple, after we were married, I remember meeting was Dana and Dillon Morse. They came up to us after the service and introduced themselves and said how they were happy that we came and hoped to see us again. It was uncommon for me to experience the kindness and openness of everyone there. In the Catholic Church you just didn’t talk and you didn’t fellowship and everything was always quiet and I just never felt involved or really accepted.
Then I did the unthinkable and chose to get married in the Baptist Church where Mark and I were going. It was a beautiful wedding and short. We had to go meet with the pastor of that church for a little counseling before we took the plunge. I honestly think that is something that everyone should do before they get married. And it is way too easy these days to get a divorce and it seems so prevalent nowadays. I relish in being with a man that I know loves me and takes our vows seriously. When we got married we only went to church every now and then and didn’t go to Sunday School. Then we got the girls, and I remember talking with Mark and discussing wanting to raise the kids in church and if we were going to be a family, that we needed to make a point to go. Now mind you I had not accepted the gift of salvation at this point. We had gone to church one Sunday and we were encouraged to go to the front of the church to join as a family. And because I had not been baptized Baptist, the next thing I knew I was suddenly being nominated to get dunked!! What the heck? I listened in church but I never really felt a change. I mean like if we didn’t make it, it was never a big deal to me. Now we made sure the kids went every Sunday and every Wednesday night but if Mark was working the weekend, I rarely went. I was dunked but I didn’t surrender my life to Christ at that point so honestly I didn’t feel like I was being baptized for the right reasons. Then I think it was in November 2003 our church put on a walk through drama that changed my life forever. It was called Judgement House and was a walk through drama about real life situations and the affects of the actors’ choices. The first one that our church did was on the Humphrey family. The play depicted the life of Kelly Humphrey who had cancer and was dying. It then brought you to the judgement after life and then it showed you Hell and Heaven. I remember going into the last scene, Heaven, with Tami sitting on my lap and seeing Jesus on the throne and the angels all around him singing and worshipping. Of course I started crying,q and then we went into a room where Leo Humphrey talked to us and then led us into a salvation prayer. Then him and our pastor, Brother Leon Dunn asked if anyone prayed that prayer and if so to raise their hand. I raised my hand, because I didn’t know for sure that I had a relationship with Jesus and I wanted that terribly. And I remember being led out of the room and into an office with Roberta5x Flanagan who counseled with me. I had already been baptized but I truly felt that night in November 2003 was when I surrendered my life to Christ. I finally felt a deep change and connection. I should have stopped cursing like a sailor when we took the girls in but it was after my rededication that things started to feel differently. We started to go to Sunday school on the days when Mark wasn’t working. We started going to Brother Randy Ray’s Sunday School class and he was a true teacher and I was learning so much.
I remember going to a church function and talking to Brother Randy’s wife, Lori, and talking to her about whether or not I would be able, with my disease, to go on the medical mission trip with the church. She told me that it was handicapped accessible and there was no reason why I could not go. That was all I needed to hear, we then made the decision to go. Brother Randy would have us memorize scripture verses for the upcoming trip. I was so excited and eager to learn and couldn’t wait to go on that trip. It was the summer of 2008 when we went on that first medical mission trip to El Salvador. We had a new pastor at that time and his wife and oldest son also went on that mission trip. We got so close with everyone there, and it was totally life changing. And awe inspiring to see the faces of people we helped and how accepting people were to hear the gospel. What I really want is to bring my oldest baby girl with us on a mission trip soon so that she can see and realize how fortunate we are to have the things that we have and how incredibly liberating it is to be able to worship and pray and preach the gospel freely. I want her to experience what I experience it like I did the first time that I went, because despite all my terminal medical issues and grim looking future, how lucky I am to live in a place where I am free and incredibly blessed. And not to get off topic but I realize that Maggie may not have the same experience that I had and all I can do is pray that she takes something life changing away.
So after those two mission trips to El Salvador was when I got pregnant with Maggie everything just really started clicking. It seemed like everything that happened, God was a part of. Now God is the reason for everything but I never really grew up knowing that. That was just a little part that I learned. We were very involved with the church and I was doing Bible studies and learning and my faith was growing. It seemed like when everything was right with God and my spiritual life, everything was kind of perfect. Now I know life is not perfect and I really can’t totally explain it but all I know is that when I asked Jesus into my heart, I had a total different outlook on life that was totally positive!
And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them.
Romans 8:28 NLT
We were at Woodland Park for a very long time, almost 17 years and so much had happened during that time and I honestly thought that I would never leave that church. We started going there before we were married, I accepted the gift of salvation there, I was descipled there, I made hundreds of friends there, I somewhat came out of my comfort zone there, my husband rediscovered his love for the saxophone there, my oldest daughter became my sister in Christ there, my second child was born and embraced and dedicated to Christ there, and most importantly I learned the love of Christ there! We had some amazing memories in that church but those doors were closing and in essence a new season was about to begin. I started to feel disconnected and I didn’t feel like I was growing and I started to lose the desire to be in my Bible and live according to the word. So we made the heartwrenching decision to leave our beloved Church. We didn’t go far because for a long time we felt like we were being called to leave Woodland Park and attend Brother Randy Ray’s new church called the River Fellowship , this was a church plant from Woodland Park. Going there was like a breath a fresh air. I finally found myself wanting to read and learn and grow. It’s kind of crazy but I kind of feel like this is a totally new season of life with a new church, new friends, a new job, and I still haven’t convinced Mark yet but maybe a new house!!!
I’m going to close with this, I am nothing without Jesus in my life and I would rather know beyond a shadow of a doubt where I am going to spend eternity, with my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and my beloved family and friends that already passed, than just coasting along life and then spending eternity burning in Hell. God sacrificed his one and only son for our sins, is it that hard to try and follow his leadership and commands?!
“For this is how God loved the world: He gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life.
John 3:16